Mommy Talk: things I would've liked to know.

Being a first time mom, I'm learning new things almost every day! However, there are things that I now know about pregnancy, labor, childbirth, caring for a baby, etc. that I would have really liked to have been warned about. I think some women hold back information to keep from "scaring" first time mommies, but let's be real it would've been nice to know some of these things. I mean once it's "go time" there's really no turning back.

This is my list of the most shocking and surprising things that happened to me at the end of my pregnancy, labor, post delivery, and the first few weeks at home. When I talked about these things with other mommy friends, they acted like it was completely normal. There was always a part of me that really wanted to say, well that would've been nice to know! So I'm sharing these things, and let's get to it...

A question I often asked when the end of my pregnancy was nearing, and I've been ask by other mommy to be friends is, what does a contraction feel like? The best way I know how to describe it is like severe period cramps. Let me put it this way- you'll know if it's go time! 

Another question women often ask is, will I know if my water breaks? I asked this question too. Statistics say that only like 12% of women's water actually breaks on it's own. My co-workers were scared to death my water was going to break at work, but thankfully that never happened! YES dear, you will know if your water breaks! There will not be a doubt in your mind. It's kind of like a water balloon popping. I don't know how to describe it except, weird!

The hear say about how you don't get to eat while in labor, it's true! No food or drink, not even water. The no water was the shocker for me. They only give you ice chips and popsicles. So if you can stomach it, eat on your way to the hospital because it could like a whole day before you get real food again. 

Sorry this may be a little TMI, but I would've liked to know. Post delivery, you bleed. A LOT. Yes, I knew I was going to bleed for a month or more after baby, but no one told me I would think I might be bleeding to death the first few days postpartum. I also was never warned that my first shower after giving birth would look like something from a horror movie or a murder scene. Apparently this is completely normal. My nurse told me that I should only be concerned if I saw clots bigger than the size of an egg. Excuse me? Yeah, I looked at her like she'd lost it too... once I went to the bathroom I then understood what she was talking about. The extra thick, super long, overnight protection, maxi pads (like these) will be your best friend for a few weeks. It's almost like you and your baby both have to wear a diaper. Lol. But seriously. 

It's very difficult to pee after birth. Now for those of you that are a badass and can do the whole natural labor thing, this might not be true. But for us normal people who get anesthesia, when they take the cath out it's like you're 3 years old again and you can't pee when you're told to. Yes, you drink TONS of water but it's still hard to go. You sit, run sink water, gulp down water from your big cup, sit some more, drink some more... but when you do finally go, it's just like when you're 3 and everyone celebrates. Well really just you and your nurse, because she's glad you she doesn't have to cath you again and you're glad that you bladder is functioning normal.

The things you said you would never wear, granny panties and a nightgown, will be your best friend. The ugly granny panties are the only thing your ginormous maxi pad will fit comfortably in. Some ladies rave about the mesh panties from the hospital, but I personally wasn't a fan. Everyone has their own personal preference. I also wasn't a fan of the hospital maxi pads and was glad I had packed my own. I've also heard wonderful things about the "ice pads" they give you, but since I ended up having to have a c-section I didn't need those.

You will fall in love with your husband all over again. We often hear this, and it is true. The things he will do for you after you give birth to his child are things you never imagined you'd ever need help with until you were at least 80. Like helping you get your panties on because you're so sore that you can't bend over. He will be so much more awesome than you ever imagined. And seeing him so proud with that sweet baby in his arms will melt your heart!

Unfortunately, there's no instruction book that comes with this tiny human. The hospital keeps you a night or two, and then they send you on your way. You're just supposed to know what to do. {And you will. Your motherly instincts will kick in, and you'll be a pro in no time.} You're told when it cries that it's usually time to do one of two things, a diaper change or time to eat. I learned that usually it's both. On a side note- change their diaper first, and then feed them! This way when they fall asleep with a full belly you can put them back down. 

Once you're home, and reality starts to set in there will be good days and bad days, along with good nights and rough nights. Getting down a routine takes a little bit of time, just be patient! {This was extremely difficult for me to do because I need like routine.} There will be days you go without a shower because baby will be so needy. There will also be days where all you can do is cry with baby because you have no idea what he/she wants since you've tried everything you know to do.

BE FLEXIBLE. I cannot say this enough, especially if you're a planner like myself. It's best to not stress and just go with flow. I like to say to have no plan, but I know first hand that's easier said than done. I was dead set that I was going to have a vaginal birth and breastfeed my baby boy. Well, things didn't go as planned and I didn't get to have a vaginal birth or breastfeed. He would never latch, so this mommy was an exclusive pumper, and had to supplement too. But it all worked out, and this momma has a happy, healthy, baby boy.

With that all being said, you'll more than likely do it all over again when it's time for baby #2! Some people say you'll forget about it, but I highly doubt that. Being a mommy is the very best thing you'll ever do! Your home will be filled with more love, joy, tears, laughs, and poop than you ever imagined. It's not easy, but it's totally worth it!

balance.

In just a few more weeks, I return back to work. I have very much enjoyed my time off with our little man, but I also am starting to look forward to being back in the office. For those of you who don't know me well- I am very strong willed and independent, so I don't think this staying at home thing would work out well for me. Yes, I'll probably shed a few tears my first day back {I'm getting a little teary eyed writing this.} but I know that me working is what's best for our family, and I refuse to feel guilty about it. So that leads me to this rambling post... balance.

Although I feel like I'm ready to go back to work, I do have questions and uncertainties floating around in my head. How will I find the right balance once I go back? How will I juggle being a good wife, a super mom, and having a career? Will there by any time left for just me?

Before Mac, Clete and I both worked our jobs and came home to do whatever we wished. If I needed to run errands after work or wanted to go get a pedi, it was no big deal. I got home when I got home. After all, Clete is a man and can take care of himself. Now, things are different. Mac in a sense "rules the roost" because we have a feeding schedule to keep to, an evening bath to give, and a bed time to get him tucked in by. No, I wouldn't change it for anything in the world! But it will require finding balance to wear the many hats I do, and wear them all well. I will have to find the balance between family, home, work, and play.

I know there's no right answer to my questions. Life doesn't come with a rule book or directions to follow, it just happens and takes time to find the answers. The answers are different for us all, and that's okay too! But sometimes it would be nice to refer back to the directions. ;)

On a lighter note, it's Friday! Yay for the weekend we've all been workin' for! Happy Father's Day weekend to all the baby daddy's out there. Be sure to let dad sit back and relax a little. Have a good weekend y'all!

Cheers to 3 Years!

Just a little love note to my husband on our anniversary...

It's been 3 whole years since we vowed to one another that no matter what life throws our way we'll embrace it, together. We've made a home, changed careers, started our family, and made memories that'll last forever. I often ask how I got so lucky! There's no one else I would want to share this life with.  

It's been said that a perfect marriage is just two imperfect people who refuse to give up on each other. Our marriage is far from perfect, but we choose to never give up on us or on each other.

We've had our share of ups and downs, but each bump along the road has only brought us closer together. I not only get to call you my husband and my baby's daddy, but also my best friend! I love doing life with you, and I look forward to what the next 50 years will bring. 

Thank you for holding me up when I'm weak, and for seeing my beauty at my ugliest times. Most of all, thank you for loving me when I'm not easy to love. 

Happy Anniversary, Mr. G! Cheers to 3 years, and to the rest of our lives together! I love you to the moon and back! xoxo

 "may we always remember that love & life are a journey we vowed to take together..."

2 months old

Today, Mac is 2 months old! Where does time go? I used to never understand when people said time goes by faster the older you get, but now I totally get it. I can't believe our little man is growing so quickly, and time is passing so fast.

Mac is social smiling, holds his head up, loves playing peek-a-boo, LOVES bath time, likes lights and movement, loves laying under his jungle mat, enjoys watching tv with daddy, loves his swing and monkey bouncer, loves to skype with Queenie & Poppie, loves to eat, and has been sleeping a solid 6 hours at night for a couple of weeks. This little boy has brought us so much joy and laughter over the past two months! I never knew being a mommy could be so much fun.

This past Friday was his 8 week appointment. It was also his first round of shots, but he was a trooper. I was dreading the appointment, but he did so good. The nurse was also super fast, so that made it better too. He only cried for a few seconds right after the sticks, and once I was able to pick him up he was fine. Mac now weighs 14 lbs, 10 oz and is 24 1/2 inches. He's in the 95th percentile for weight and the 75th percentile for height. Dr. Stecklow said all looked well, and that we've got a healthy boy!

Dear Baby Mac,

Two months ago you came into this big world, and changed our lives forever. We anxiously awaited your arrival, and now we cannot imagine our life without you. You're growing up way too fast, but mommy & daddy love watching you grow and change everyday. We can't wait to see what God has in store for the big life you have ahead of you. We love you, sweet boy- more than you'll ever know!
XOXO,
Mommy

Meeting Mac

The day was here! The day we had been awaiting for 9 months had arrived. Thursday, April 10, 2014 is the day that our lives changed forever...

I was up and ready to go, all before Clete's alarm went off. I tried stay quiet so he could sleep since we had a big day ahead of us. After we got around, and got the car loaded we left for the hospital. We arrived at the hospital shortly after 5:00AM. They got us checked in, showed us to our room, and told me to get changed and that my nurse would be in shortly. I got in my hospital gown, crawled into the bed, and soon after my nurse arrived. There was lots of paperwork and questions, but once that was all done she started my IV to start speeding things along. Around 7:00AM my parents arrived, and there was nurse shift change. ALL of the nurses and staff were wonderful! They made me feel so comfortable, and like we had known them for years. Clete and I couldn't have been happier with the care we received. The labor nurse that checked us in told us goodbye and that she'd see us that evening. She said she hoped to meet our baby boy when she returned, but that sometimes she does come back to help deliver. My day labor nurse was just as great! She made sure I felt comfortable, had ice chips, and would bring popsicles per my request. She also told me that when I started to get uncomfortable to let her know and she'd order my anesthesia.

Shortly before 9AM my doctor came in to check my progression, and also broke my water. My doctor and nurse said things should start to move along since she had broken my water. Around 10:45AM I started having pretty hard contractions so I requested my epidural. Once the anesthesiologist was out of surgery he came in to see me. The epidural was one thing I was really nervous about, but it wasn't bad at all. Dr. Brown was quick and made it as painless as possible. Once the epidural set it, the waiting game began. Dr. Chambers {my doc} would come down every couple of hours to check me, or would call the nurses to get my progress.

At 1:00PM she came in and I was 100% effaced and dilated to a 4. She told me to just hang tight because she knew at any time I was going to progress fast. Our visitors went to lunch, and I napped while we were waiting on our little man. When Dr. Chambers came in around 5:00PM to check, I was still at a 4. She told Clete and I that we had two options... we could do a c-section or we could wait. Normally, a woman would progress at 1cm an hour and I had been stuck at a 4 for 4 hours. She said with how my pregnancy had gone, and since both me and baby's vitals were good she had no problem with waiting. I really did NOT want a c-section. It was my biggest fear going into labor. I told her that I would like to wait and see how things looked again in two hours. She had no problem with that. Clete and I discussed after she left, that if 7:00PM rolled around and nothing had changed we would take her advice on what to do. I in no way felt like she was trying to force a c-section on me, so if she felt like that was best then we'd take that route. After all, I didn't want to get into an emergency situation and them have to rush to take him c-section. 

Shortly before 7:00PM she called and had the labor nurses come check me... I was still stuck at a 4. They told me they could feel his head and they could also feel fluid building up around it. I told the nurse to ask Dr. Chambers what she would suggest we do, and that we felt confident to go with whatever she suggested. When the nurses walked out, I knew I was going to have to have a c-section. One of my biggest fears through my pregnancy was coming reality. As soon as my parents walked back into the room, I completely lost it. I was scared to death. I'd never been hospitalized before, so going under surgery was scary to me. I still get emotional thinking about it, but I looked at my mom with tears in my eyes and said, "have dad come pray with us." It was a special moment for me... Clete, my mom, my aunt, and my dad gathered around my bed and held hands as my dad led us in prayer. After that, I felt confident I was making the best decision and I felt at peace. I was disappointed I wouldn't be able to deliver naturally, but I was okay with it.

Once Dr. Chambers arrived at the hospital she came to our room and talked to us. She told me she knew this wasn't my plan, but that everything would be fine. She also then told us she had gone through 3 c-sections herself. Again, this made me feel better about it. After she left the room, they started prepping me for surgery. Dr. Brown came back in to change out my anesthesia, my nurse got everything else ready and within minutes we were off to the OR. My mom walked with Clete and I down to the double doors. It was very obvious I was nervous and scared, but Clete and Dr. Brown kept insuring me that all would be fine. They showed Clete to a small room to get changed, and they took me on to the OR.

It felt like it was 10 degrees in the OR. They moved me over to the operating table and started prepping for surgery. Dr. Brown stayed up by my head and talked to me to calm my nerves. He also insured me that he would get Clete before they started surgery. The nurses and doctor's were talking, my nurse stated my name and information, and soon after Clete came in. They gave him a chair and he sat right beside my head, holding my hand. Dr. Brown also stayed close by and talked to us telling us what was going on. Right before they pulled Mac out, Dr. Brown told Clete to stand up because he would want to see him come into the world. Clete stood up, and a moment later I heard our sweet baby boy cry for the first time. At 7:28PM our little baby boy, Mac James was born. Clete's words were, "he's beautiful just like his momma!" Dr. Chambers said my gosh he is huge and I remember thinking what does that even mean? She couldn't get over how big he was, and how she had under estimated his size. She held him up for me to see, and then the nurses took him to get him cleaned up, weighed, etc. Clete walked over and took pictures with his phone while they finished sewing me up. Once they had him weighed, measured and a diaper on, I got to hold my sweet baby boy for the first time. It was truly love at first sight. Clete snapped a picture of us with his phone and sent to my mom so everyone waiting would know Mac had arrived and that we were all doing well. 

For me, the rest of the evening was a little bit of a blur. Once they took Mac to the nursery, Clete went with him for a while. His blood sugar got low, so the nurses kept a close eye on him by checking it and made sure it was rising by giving him formula. Mac came into this world weighing in at 9 lbs 6 oz and 22 inches long. It was love at first site for us all!

April 10, 2014 was the day that our lives changed forever. For the better, of course! It's the date I earned the title of "mom" and our baby, Mac joined us in this big world. Our newest addition has turned in a brand new chapter of life. Being Mac's mommy is the best thing ever!

A special thank you to my dear friend Kylie for capturing Mac's birth day. These pictures I will cherish forever. All photo credits go to Kylligraphy Photography Lettering and Design.